Falling pregnant isn’t like they teach you at school

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Growing up in a Catholic all-girls High School, there’s that fateful term in year 9 where students are treated to a class or two about conception, pregnancy, and all the other biological aspects of procreating.

I’m not sure if it was only my school who decided to instill the fear of God in their students by showing a room full of 15-year-olds a front-row seat of a baby being delivered, or if it was a syllabus requirement. This video was usually swiftly followed by every girl crossing their legs very tightly in hopes the act would fuse their knees together.

Fast forward 15 years, and the news of a friend’s pregnancy is met with ‘congratulations’ rather than ‘oh shit’s’ and it seems everyone you’ve ever met has had a baby or is currently pregnant. That, or Instagram has decided the only content it’ll feed you is pregnancy-related ads.

Of course, you’re thrilled to hear your closest friends and family have a little one on the way, but it also acts as bait for that green-eyed jealousy monster.

From those few biology science classes in year 9 to every movie and TV series ever, it’s ingrained that falling pregnancy is WAY too easy- well that’s until you’re actually trying to.

News flash: it ain’t!

There are ovulation apps and fertile periods and then there’s the whole ‘is your discharge normal’ situation- if you know, you know. The two weeks between your fertile week and getting your period crawls by as slow as the speed I get to my washing machine to hang my laundry out, which to give you an idea, is at a glacial pace (my washing machine is beeping at me as I write this)

Florian and I have been trying only for a few months, but I always just assumed it was something that happened on the first few tries. It does not. Every time I feel more tired than usual, or I feel nauseous and ignore the fact I ate about 3kgs in noodles for dinner, I immediately wonder, is this it?!

Alas, it turns out monthly it is not.

According to an article in the New York Post, it takes couples an average of 185 days or roughly 6 months to fall pregnant, so we’re not even close, but it’s crazy how easy it is to become slightly coo-coo about it all.

I can’t imagine how stressful it is for couples who have been trying for longer to no avail. It feels like no one talks about it and, as usual, we’re only treated to the highlight reels of people’s pregnancy journies.

So here is the blog for anyone who is feeling a little (or a lot) stressed out about the process.

Enjoy the holidays, put away the apps, opt for a book over social media, and remember you’re not alone.

It’s time to shift gears and remember this process is meant to be fun, not a chore!

Now, I better go hang out my laundry.

-tgfs x

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